When did you start farting?

How long did it take you to relax and start farting in front of your wife or girlfriend? It took me 6 years of being in a relationship (on and off) and only a year of marriage. My point I guess is, when you get married it's all settled, you don't have to pretend anymore, she bought the product and there's no moneyback guarantee. It's too late now, she can't say "Oh my God, I didn't know this thing farts". The funniest thing to me is my wife's face when I rip one off. She's shocked as if I've never done it before. Makes me laugh even more. Not having to try so hard anymore probably reflects on our sex life as well. I guess deep down all men are conquerors so when we conquer one thing, be it a female, territory or position (status) we move on. A lot like animal kingdom, wouldn't you say? When you can't conquer you fantasize about it, right? Most of my fantasies revolve around women that are constantly close by. The top 5 would have to be my wife's sister Jane, my mother in law, my wife's cousin Nicole, her best friends Deborah and Denise. Wife's back. Gotta run.